Mission Accomplished

Rocky certainly was a hard nut to crack, but in the end I did manage to crack him. He actually left my house only several hours ago. It was our first encounter together (besides our drunken antics at the bar when we initially met). Whether it will be the last, only time will tell.

The last I wrote, I had texted him the night before to offer my help with a work project. He didn’t answer me immediately so I figured he was just going to ignore me. I wasn’t particularly surprised so it didn’t bother me.

But then, 5 days later, he responded to thank me for the offer. And something about that timing just struck me as odd. The fact that he bothered to answer at all, and then the fact that he answered so long after I’d texted him. Was he just extremely busy and it slipped his mind to respond, or did I pop into his mind or something? I just had a sense of intuition about it.

In the ensuing days we had minimal conversation back and forth about innocuous subjects. I noticed that he texts very grammatically correct. He uses proper capitalization and punctuation and things of that nature and I thought it was really cute. I’m kind of a grammar Nazi sometimes and I myself tend to text in proper sentences, so I can appreciate someone else who does as well. I pretty much told him as much and that was that.

The fun really started on the Friday of St. Patty’s weekend. I went out that evening with Carly and got intoxicated. Later in the night I ended up texting Rocky to tell him that I hope he didn’t think that I was trying to make fun of him about the way he texts. He said he didn’t think that was the case. I told him I’m glad, because I knew he’d either want to screw my brains out or kick my ass, and I certainly didn’t want it to be the latter.

His response: “You’re naughty.”

And that did it. The first signs of cracking. The first time since we met that he’d actually flirted with me blatantly. I was flirty in return but he didn’t answer.

The next night, equally as hammered, I asked him if he wanted some naughty pictures or not. He said he did so I sent him several. He never answered. I sent him another on Sunday and he never answered. He actually never responded for that whole week. Kind of an unsettling thing when you’ve just shown parts of your naked body to someone…makes you feel kind of vulnerable and insecure. I wasn’t very happy about that. Did he not find me attractive? Was he just toying with me and getting me to send him pictures so he could show them to people? (For fear of that happening, I never include my face in naughty pictures anyway.) Without any kind of feedback whatsoever I was completely befuddled. Whatever the case, I just wrote it off as a loss and went on with my life with the intention of not contacting him again.

That lasted until the Monday before last. I was out and happened to run into some of his crew. That made me think about him so I broke down and ended up texting him late in the night and asking him if he was just going to ignore me. No response.

The next evening I apologized for any perceived bitchiness. And I offered to make it up to him with a sexual favor. To my delight, he finally answered. And eventually he started being very flirtatious again. He even ended up asking me for pictures, which I took for him and sent him. Cracking even more deeply…now we were getting somewhere. He asked if I was home and I said yes and told him he could come over, but he said he was expected at home.

This past Monday I was out drinking with my friends all day for baseball and I ended up drunk texting him. He talked about being reluctant about this because he’s in a committed relationship. I assured him the best that I could that I would never run my mouth or do anything to get him in trouble. He said if he were to come over, it’d possibly be very early Thursday morning, like around 6:30 a.m. Later in the night he apparently ended up getting drunk himself and started talking dirty to me, which was a bit of a turn on.

We didn’t speak Tuesday. I was kind of trying to wait him out yesterday and see if he’d initiate contact, but finally I bit the bullet and asked if I’d be seeing him the next morning. I was expecting some kind of excuse, because it’s clear that he’s nervous about getting caught (which is understandable), so I figured he’d come up with some reason to back out. But to my surprise he  confirmed that he’d see me around 6:30 a.m. the next morning.

I didn’t get home until a little after 1 a.m. Nevertheless, I woke up shortly after 5 a.m., showered, got pretty, and put on a nice baby doll. I was a little pissed at my face because it’s been breaking out a  bit lately and although it’s simmering down, there are still a few small pimples and some scarring. I have very resilient skin so it’ll all be gone in a matter of weeks, but I wanted it gone NOW. I wanted to look my best and felt like I didn’t, and I hate that. On the bright side though, I think my body looked awesome. I’ve actually lost close to 20 pounds over the last several months by being consistent with the gym and a lot better with my diet, and it shows.  I’m a lot more toned and even showing the faintest traces of a 6-pack, which is pretty neat. So even if my face wasn’t looking its best, I think my body made up for it.

He showed up pretty promptly. Still as cute as I remembered. He’s in his mid-30s and his hair is already greying, but he has a pretty boyish looking face which creates an attractively odd contrast. He came in and I escorted him upstairs to my room. Immediately upon closing the door we started kissing and fondling against the wall.

We made out, I gave him head, and he came. But only moments later he was ready to go again and we had sex. He was on top and it was pretty good stuff. He’s strong and intense.  To my pleasant surprise, he actually pretty big. I barely remembered it from our bar encounter over a month ago, so it was like seeing it for the first time again. He finished (I guess) and then we laid together and talked for a while. Then eventually I started kissing on him again and giving him more head. I would’ve been willing to finish him that way, but before I knew it he was jumping back on top of me. And after a while he was pulling me on top of him and I rode him until he came again. (So refreshing as opposed to my retarded encounters with Blaze.) We laid together for a little bit longer and then he had to go. I walked him out and he gave me a goodbye kiss and that was that.

So now I have to wait out this horrible limbo stage. Was it just a one-time thing, or will he want to see me again? I can’t call it. I’d do it again, but that’ll be up to him. I’m going to leave the ball in his court. Because really, I’m not exactly sure how to proceed at this point anyway. He’s in a relationship, so it’s not like there’s any chance of a traditional courtship or anything like that. We’re not going to, like, get to know each other and fall in love. It’d be strictly a sexual thing, which is fine with me. But I don’t want him to feel pressured or to feel like I’m pressing him or “expecting” something or anything like that, so I’m just going to leave it to him to hit me up again if he wants to. I do realize I need to be careful about texting him anyway because I never know if he’s with his woman and preoccupied or whatever.

And if it was a one-time thing, then oh well. It was worth it.

In other news, Blaze is still Blaze. I had an impromptu sexual encounter with Zach last week sometime. He was tipsy and I was a little tipsy and he texted me at the right time and ended up coming over and we did our thing and then he left. I’ve talked to him here and there since then but not really. And I’m not worried about it at all. I heard through later accounts of the Saturday of St. Patty’s weekend that I made out with an unidentified guy in a bar, which neither me or my friends recall. Oh, and then early the next morning I had sex with Don on my friend Kip’s couch. Woody clearly likes me and seems to think that one day he’s going to wear me down, but little does he know that I don’t operate like that at all. I either want you from the get-go or I don’t. People don’t grow on me…I just want who I want.

Life is grand.

The Rundown

Domino: Well that’s done. Not only in a romantic sense either. At this point we probably aren’t going to be speaking in any capacity for a very long time.

Before last night I hadn’t had any substantial conversation with him since early January. It was at that time that I got around to casually asking him about the mystery girl I’d seen him with in the Facebook pictures. He said it was just a friend of his sister’s.

Since then we hadn’t spoken, and it didn’t matter to me either way. But I did notice on Facebook several weeks ago that he was tagged in some pictures from a friend’s birthday dinner and that his date appeared to be his “sister’s friend” – surprise, surprise. So it was at that point that I realized that someone had been fibbing just a little bit. It’s not like I ever had feelings for Domino or anything like that, so I wasn’t jealous or hurt or really concerned that he was obviously dating this girl, but I just don’t like when people can’t be straight up with me about obvious shit…it’s insulting to the intelligence, really. Even still, I didn’t bother broaching the issue with him because I just didn’t care enough to.

What DID get under my skin was discovering last night that he had unfriended me on Facebook. I figured it was because he was trying to hide from me the fact that he’s dating someone or whatever. That annoyed me, so I texted him to confront him about it. When I didn’t receive a prompt response, I figured he was just ignoring me so I said screw it and deleted his number from my phone.

He finally replied a couple of hours later. It turns out I had mistakenly texted an old phone of his. He asked me what I was talking about and told me it must’ve been me who deleted him. Really, dude? I think I would know if I deleted somebody, and if that were the case, why in the world would I text you asking why you deleted me? That makes no sense.

I told him if he did it to hide the fact that he has a girlfriend from me, he need not bother because I really don’t care…it’s not like I wasn’t dealing with other guys myself. It’s really not that serious. He continued to insist that he didn’t delete me and then got irritated with me for whatever reason and told me he regretted giving me his new number again. Naturally the conversation then deteriorated into an insult-fest wherein I advised him that his girlfriend isn’t pretty (she’s not) and that I hope she enjoys small penises. He called me a slut, and I said a few more choice things. A little while later I explained that I didn’t intend for the conversation to end up the way it did. He never answered.

And so that’s that. Oh well.

Zach: About 2 weeks after Zach pulled his bullshit he hit me up again with a text like it had never happened. He was displeased that I had deleted his number from my phone. I’m not exactly sure why he would’ve thought I wouldn’t have taken it out. I genuinely intended on never speaking to him again.

Once we got past all that I asked him what had changed in the 2 weeks since he’d declared his love for someone else and cut me out of his life. He said something about not knowing what he wants and that he’s just very sexually attracted to me which makes him cave in and contact me sometimes when he’s thinking about me.


But to make a short story even shorter, his renewed interest didn’t last but a couple of days, as eventually he went on again to pull his same old bullshit and tell me he doesn’t think it’s a good idea that we talk. *Yawn*

I really had no intention of contacting him again, but a newsworthy incident occurred yesterday involving a mutual acquaintance of ours and it made me think about him. So I ended up texting him last night to talk about that, primarily.

Then he started asking me how I am and bringing up good times from the past. And he remarked on how it’s been over a year since we saw each other, like he was wistful or something. We said goodnight on good terms but I’m 100% positive it won’t be long before he pisses me off again.

Don: The Saturday before last I hung out with my buddies and had a grand ol’ time. Don was there, sans annoying ex-girlfriend, so we ended up flirting for a lot of the night. Once it was established that we would both be crashing at our buddy Kip’s house, it kind of became an unspoken certainty that we’d end up hooking up. I still had to make up for that time I was cockblocked by his annoying ex.

And hook up we did. I was hammered, so the events are fuzzy, but it was standard stuff. Nothing really to write home about though. Or maybe so, since I’m obviously writing about it. But no, not really.

Rocky: The Monday before last I met my buddies out for happy hour. There was another group of people from work at the same bar having a going away party for one of their colleagues who was headed to greener pastures. I’m cool with some of these people to the extent that I see them out from time to time and speak or may even chill with them for a little bit over a couple of drinks. I didn’t really intend to, but somehow I ended up defecting from my original group of friends and hanging out with this crowd for most of the night in another part of the bar.

While I was talking to some of the guys that I know, I noticed another one of them from across the bar glancing over from time to time. He looked familiar, but I couldn’t exactly place him. I ended up wandering over to where he was eventually to tease him and a few of the other guys for screwing around with another buddy of theirs who was engrossed in conversation with a girl.

Somehow, me and himRocky – ended up sticking near each other and conversing for a while. I was a little tipsy at this point so I can’t really remember a lot of the conversation, but we talked to each other mostly alone for a lot of the night. Eventually I remembered why he looked familiar and realized who he was. A couple of years ago I saw him in a picture with another guy buddy from work, and I remembered remarking on him (Rocky) being attractive. My buddy told me who he was and relayed that he had a girlfriend, and that was that. But I remembered who he was and even, admittedly, Facebook stalked him from time to time. Not that I told him that.

But lo and behold, there he was in the flesh.

So, I really don’t at all remember how things got to this point, but eventually he said he was going to the bathroom and told me to meet him in there. He went off to the bathroom, I waited several moments so as not to look obvious, and then I sneaked into the men’s bathroom with him.

He led me over to the one stall inside it, but it didn’t have a door. I remember complaining that I’d rather go somewhere else where there was a little more privacy, but he wasn’t having it and kind of cornered me in the stall and wouldn’t let me out. So we ended up making out and fooling around there.

I’m not sure how long this went on, but I do know that, as I anticipated, we were eventually interrupted. I opened my eyes to see some random guy standing directly behind him, completely flustered and apologetic over what he walked in on. Oops.

I was too tipsy to really be embarrassed. I just straightened myself up and casually walked out and went back downstairs to everyone else. I thought Rocky had followed right behind me but when I rejoined everyone else he was MIA. I looked around for him a little bit and then figured he must’ve rolled out, but he reappeared not much later. I’m not really sure of the specifics of our interaction, but at some point we made plans to meet at his car.

He eventually paid his tab and rolled out, but not before telling me where he was parked. Again, I waited several moments after he left so as not to look obvious, then I walked out casually to look for him. I walked around the block but didn’t see him anywhere, so I figured he must’ve left. But then as I was walking back toward the bar, he was driving past and spotted me, backed up and let me in his car. What exactly our activities were in there escapes me because I was severely intoxicated at this point. I do remember giving him my number and having him call my phone right then so I’d have his, but I don’t even really remember what we did or what was said or even getting back out of his car and making my way back to the bar.

The next day I discovered I’d sent him a text telling him I can’t wait to make out with him again. He never answered it. Later that day I reiterated that I meant what I said. Still no answer. Hmm. I kind of figured where this was headed.

Thursday afternoon I gave it one more shot and asked if I had to start sending him naughty pictures to get him to start paying attention to me. I didn’t check my phone for a while after that but eventually came back to it to see a reply text advising me that he has a girlfriend and that he’s sorry if he misled me. I replied that I remembered the girlfriend thing, and that I wasn’t trying to be his girlfriend…I just thought we could’ve had more fun.

And…nothing. I’m really disappointed about that. I would’ve liked to have screwed his brains out, sober. He’s pretty hot.

I did end up texting him last night to offer my assistance with a work-related matter. He never answered and I doubt he will, but I just wanted to extend the offer. Oh well.

Blaze: Blaze is still Blaze. He’s been over a couple of times this year, and we even had a rendezvous in his truck a little over a month ago when it turned out we were both out in the same vicinity at the same time. Nothing has really changed there though.

I was actually supposed to hook up with him the night I met Rocky, but obviously that didn’t happen. The next day I did admit that I was too busy playing with someone else. I felt bad and later told him I was just joking, but he didn’t seem to care either way.

Sometimes he seems to be softening up, but I don’t know. His Facebook page no longer says he’s in a relationship. And I even got to asking him recently if he has a girlfriend and he said he doesn’t.

But really, this whole thing is starting to bore me, and I’ve not been so shy about letting him know so. A FWB arrangement really should be mutually beneficial. Otherwise, what’s the point? And what also irks me is the fact that sometimes he’s rather demanding about me making time and/or going out of my way to meet up with him. Not cool. I’ve been kind of giving him a hard time about this arrangement lately.

He was trying to stop by on Sunday but I declined and told him I’m getting tired of this hit-and-run thing and that it turns me off. He only answered with a simple “Ok,” so I figured I probably wouldn’t be hearing from him again. And I wasn’t really that pressed.

But I was surprised when he hit me up on Tuesday night. I didn’t get a chance to answer for a couple of hours and when I did he said he just wanted to see what I was doing. I told him I’m sure he just wanted some action, and he said that would’ve been nice. He then suggested that perhaps he could come over Thursday (today) and watch a movie. He actually did end up coming over today but we didn’t watch a movie. We did hang out for a little while…more than usual I guess. I guess he’s starting to see that the status quo isn’t working for me anymore. But even still, as I’ve told him, I don’t want him to pretend to want to hang out with me just to get some play.


The Great Escape

Last night, as planned, I forwent a night out on the regular strip of bars I frequent in favor of another part of town.  Both areas are upscale neighborhoods that house clusters of restaurants, bars, stores, and what have you. They both draw handsome crowds consisting primarily of the 20- and 30-something yuppie type. Other than the fact that finding parking in last night’s neighborhood can be much more difficult than the area I usually frequent, there’s no huge difference between the two. It’s just that I’ve been partying in my normal area for years now and so it’s like home. It’s my “Cheers.” My comfort zone. A blessing and a curse, because while it suits me just fine most of the time, occasionally I find myself disenchanted with it. Bored. Craving something new.

The thing is, I go out alone 90% of the time. Part of the reason is that I don’t have the common 9-5 career, nor do the majority of the people I hang out with, who are friends I know from work and thus have the same hectic schedule. So coordinating outings amongst a myriad of random schedules can be a bit of a bitch. Even trying to coordinate with friends that do work normal 9-5s can be a bitch. Then besides that, I appreciate being able to do MY thing and not being subject to the fancies, whims, and idiosyncrasies of other people. I can go where I want to go, stay as long as I want, and leave when I want. I don’t have kids or a husband or any kind of real obligations in my life whatsoever at the moment besides work, and I enjoy being able to party accordingly. And I’m partial to my “Cheers” because it’s the familiar and I feel comfortable there alone. And 75% of the time I end up running into someone I know anyway.

But I wanted to explore some newer territory last night, so I ventured elsewhere. I’ve been there before, but not in a long while. My only immediate worry was the possibility of having to spend half a century looking for a parking space, but as luck would have it I scored a prime spot within moments. Lucky me!

Bar #1 was a bar I’d been to and had a decent time at in the past. I was at the bar enjoying my own company for a while before a completely-not-my-type guy ended up next to me and started trying to make conversation. No harm in conversation. It was benign enough anyway, as one of our first topics stemmed from him inquiring about what kind of earrings he should buy for his lady friend. He bought me a drink, but he never actually made a true pass at me or anything. It was just innocent conversation, which is refreshing. Well…up to the point when he asked me if I’d be interested in smoking weed with him, which elicited a resounding response in the negative. Fortunately I wasn’t interested in him at that point, because that most certainly would’ve been a turn off. I’m not fond of smoking in general – whether it be cigarettes, weed, crack, meth, etc. He bounced. I chilled there for a little while longer and then got bored and left for greener pastures.

While en route to bar #2, I ran across this guy who is a good friend of my buddy, Kip. I was out with Kip and other friends one night months and months ago when this friend showed up. I was completely, unequivocally hammered and so was he. We both had to crash in Kip’s living room and ended up making out extensively before we both passed out. I hadn’t seen or talked to him since. It took me a few moments to realize it was him when he greeted me as we passed each other. Which is just as well being as his greeting to me was “Hey, sweetheart,” so I doubt he even remembers my name anyway.

Anyway…arrived to bar #2. Had a drink and a shot. No hot guys. Didn’t get any play. Yawn-fest. Went back to bar #1.

Side Note:

I find it strange that I always feel like I get the least amount of play when I think I look my absolute hottest. So I’m either not as hot as I think I am, or I’m hot to the point where it’s intimidating. I’m not sure I really seem that approachable in general, but really it’s because I’m shy. Like, I know that if a cute guy looks at you, you’re supposed to maintain eye contact and smile or something, but I never do that because guys looking at me make me look away instead. It makes me feel self-conscious, I guess. But I suppose I give the impression sometimes, even with good looking guys, that I’m not approachable or that I’m standoffish or probably a complete, snobby bitch. Which I am, on occasion. But not always.

Anyway, it’s my second go-round at bar #1 and I’m drinking water watching wasted people dance, or attempt to. Had I been wasted, I might’ve been out there with them, but it just wasn’t in the cards last night. I was actually a good girl. At some point I ended up falling into conversation with a guy we’ll call Lawyer Guy (LG). I don’t know where LG came from – if he was standing nearby the whole time or if he zeroed in on me from across the room or what – but we started talking somehow. He was an out-of-town lawyer from the Midwest visiting for business purposes. I surmised that he’s some type of bleeding heart liberal who represents people who have been wronged by “The Man” or something. A pseudo ambulance chaser. Decent looking, but not exactly my type – too scrawny. He was my exact height at best (and I was wearing flats), if not slightly shorter, and thin. I like my men tall and brawny. At least solid, if not tall. He just seemed kind of squirrelly.

He had asked me to dance but I honestly just didn’t feel like it, so I declined. But he continued to hover and talk, which I was indifferent about, really. At one point this blond guy took notice of me, grabbed my hand, and literally pulled me right away from LG and towards himself so he could tell me how beautiful I am. He wasn’t bad looking, but it was obvious that he was completely wasted and that any form of productive conversation would’ve been impossible. Plus, although I wasn’t really interested in LG, I thought it would’ve been rude to ditch him like that since he had been in mid-conversation with me and pretty nice so far. So I politely retreated from blond guy and returned to LG.

But then once I’m back talking with him, it starts dawning more heavily on me how uninterested I am in him. I excuse myself to go to the restroom. And I really did have to go, but I was undecided in regards to whether or not I’d actually return back to LG or just leave. Probably about 80/20 in favor of leaving. But he was one step ahead of me. As I was almost to the restroom, I turn around and see that he’s right on my heels telling me he has to use the restroom too and that we can meet back up right outside of the restrooms. Darn. And of course I come back out and he’s standing right there waiting. This one’s determined.

We start walking back toward the bar and he grabs my hand and holds it. I allow that for less than 3 footsteps and then pull it away, ostensibly to grab my phone from my purse. Then he asks me what my name is again. Nice. I gave him a pass on that because he appeared to be rather intoxicated.

The night is waning down at this point. The lights are on, the music is off, and it’s almost that time for the bouncers to initiate the mass exodus. He asks me if I’d like to get a drink back at his hotel. I shouldn’t have, but I said yes. Sometimes I end up back at peoples’ homes because the bars are closing and I want more liquor, but not necessarily anything to do with the hosts themselves. This was one of those occasions. I felt like drinking more, but I was totally not interested in him. But I knew what he was REALLY asking me for, and I knew I’d have to deal with it eventually.

He tried this hand-holding business again as we were walking out. And again I had to shut that down quickly. I’m not sure if he was just drunk or if he was trying to mark his territory or what exactly the deal with that was, but it was annoying. I’m not your woman. He immediately went for a cab, but I informed him that I have a car and I was fine to drive and led him in that direction. He gave me the address to his hotel and I put it in my GPS and we set off.

On the way there I asked him if he remembered my name. He didn’t. I told him for the third time. I was amused at the dichotomy between him trying to hold my hand one moment and failing to remember my name the next. I spend most of the 10-minute drive trying to figure out exactly how I’m going to ditch this guy smoothly. I figure, based on the location of the hotel in a very parking-unfriendly area, that I could just drop him off in front, feign going to look for parking, and just never come back. But that was out when we pull up and he instructs me that I can just go to the valet.

Noticing the valet prices, and being cognizant of the fact that I don’t have any cash on me (which is the norm), I ask LG if he’d cover the valet. He agrees, and I make him give me $20.00 right then and there because I don’t know exactly how the night’s events are going to play out, but I do know that he’ll only wind up being disappointed when he realizes he’s not going to get in my pants. So it’s best to get the money up front before that happens so I’ll have it for the valet upon my departure.

As I’m leaving my car with the valet, I advise him that I’ll be out in less than an hour. He says he’ll just leave my car right out front then since it’s such a short amount of time. I realize after the fact that I might’ve seemed like a prostitute or something, coming in in the wee hours of the morning with a hotel guest and expressing my intentions to be there for less than an hour. If  LG had in fact been Richard Gere from Pretty Woman, this might’ve gone a lot differently. But alas…

We get to his room and he asks me if I have to go to the bathroom. I do not. He says he does and goes into the bathroom. I seize that opportunity to quietly open the room door and make a hasty escape to the elevator, which thankfully opens immediately. I march to the valet to pay and get my keys. He says I wasn’t there that long, so I don’t owe anything, although I can tip if I want. I leave him the $20.00 that LG gave me, scurry quickly to my car which is right out front as promised, and drive off into the night.

Oh well, he got a ride back to his hotel at least.