Well I finally had the chance to talk to JP on the phone for the first time yesterday evening. He called me and I was a bit shy initially, hearing his voice for the first time and having him hear mine. He had a nice voice though. It was what I thought it would be. We were on the phone for maybe 20 minutes making steady conversation about various things and then he said he had to go because his friends had arrived. He had come back from Spain Friday and then instead of going home, traveled back to his hometown in New York to visit friends. The life of a jet-setting pilot, I suppose. We hung up and I was starting to get ready for a party when moments later my phone was ringing again. He was calling me back because his friends actually hadn’t arrived yet, but were just calling to say they were close. We talked for about 5 more minutes before they showed up for real.
I thought it was cute that he bothered to call me back for those 5 extra minutes. He finally friend requested me on Facebook as well, and after poring through his pictures I realized that he was actually pretty attractive. I liked his personality and I liked his voice and he’s smart and skilled and gainfully employed and just a neat person. He even immediately deleted a Facebook album containing nothing but pictures of him and his ex-girlfriend after I said something about it.
I was starting to feel something like…butterflies. Granted, we hadn’t met and had been talking for all of 4 days. But he made a relentless effort to keep in touch with me during those 4 days and I learned a lot about him and he about me and I’d consider it quality contact.
Yes, I thought to myself, this could be a guy I could date. Yes, he lives in another city, but he’s a pilot so even if we lived near each other he’d be gone 50% of the time anyway. It’d be like a long-distance relationship regardless.
And there I was all set to write this entry today singing his praises…about looking forward to meeting him in person soon and all that jazz…
Then came this morning’s conversation.
It turns out that his birthday is 4 days before mine. I regaled him with that fact this morning via text after saying good morning. He responded that he learned a few days ago that his “friend’s” birthday is the same as mine.
So, to back up…the first night we started texting, I asked him how many girls he had met from Tinder. He told me 3. One was a girl he had a few dates with and she wanted a relationship but he didn’t. The second one catfished him by turning out to weigh significantly more in person than she did in her pictures. Then he mentioned another girl who was “his friend now.” Of course, not even really knowing this guy from Adam and not being particularly interested at him one way or the other at the time, I didn’t think anything of that. I just inferred that they had met but connected more in a friendly way than any other.
When he mentioned this “friend” today, I instinctually knew he was talking about this Tinder girl. I inquired exactly as to what their status was. He just met her last Friday (the Friday right before we started texting, I assume). He said he thinks she’s a serial dater that dates around and doesn’t put titles on anything. I asked if he likes her and he says he does. “It’s weird,” but he does. But he doesn’t know where he stands with her. And he had no bad intentions with me (after I asked what his point was in obtaining my number and saying he wanted to meet me and talking to me all week?) but he didn’t know he would have feelings for her.
I recounted to him how he came at me like he’s interested in me, but I didn’t take it too seriously at first because we hadn’t met in person, but after he made a point of keeping in RELENTLESS contact with me all week, he grew on me and I started to feel some butterflies and thought it was mutual. And now this.
It became kind of cumbersome to text all of this, so I thought it better to speak verbally and tried calling him but he didn’t answer. He sent me a text to say he’s in his friend’s car on the way to the airport. I apologized and said I just thought it’d be better to actually speak.
No reply. He’s traveling, so it’s understandable. But at this point I wouldn’t be surprised to hear very little from him again, if ever anything at all.
I mean, really though? If this girl was so effing great, and you met her in person BEFORE you started pursuing me, then why did you start pursuing me in the first place?
I mean…I’m blown. It always feels good when a guy makes you feel kind of special, regardless of the fact that I’ve been in contact with him for not even a week and we haven’t even met in person.
But, what I learned, I did like. And I rarely ever like anyone. And when I start to, then there’s always some nonsense like this. Always. Hence my perpetual singledom.
It makes me a little sad, but I’ll get over it.