The Lowdown on Ben

It just occurred to me that I never wrapped up the sordid Ben saga, that situation coming to a head and completely disintegrating around Thanksgiving.

Because it was a couple of days beforehand that I tried to make conversation and he responded with telling me that the girl he is seeing is in town. Ugh. Admittedly, I was the slightest bit jealous because I kind of liked him, but I couldn’t really be mad because I knew he was seeing someone and thought that he was trying to be the tiniest bit honest at least.

Or not really.

Because shit ended up hitting the fan the Sunday after Thanksgiving, when I hit him up again, thinking perhaps maybe the coast was clear after she came to spend Thanksgiving with him or whatever. All I did was send him a message saying his name: “Ben…”

He responded back abruptly and bizarrely saying that he thinks its best if we cut off contact because he wants to be respectful to her. And then he promptly blocked me. Yikes. I was a little bit blown but I figured he was right…maybe it’s all for the best…

But then an hour later, I’m getting FB messages from a random girl asking me about the nature of my relationship with Ben. This person turns out to be a good friend of Ben’s girlfriend and she informs me that Ben and his girlfriend are currently embroiled in a huge fight over me because she saw my message to him. Ben was trying to play me off as just a “friend” but I quickly inform Ms. BFF that that is not at all the case.

The gist of the situation was that Ben and his girlfriend had been dating for about a year and a half. They had broken up over the summer because of his habitual cheating, but then she took him back some time around late August. The BFF was trying to establish whether or not Ben and I had had sexual contact since then and I informed her that we definitely did, sorry to be the bearer of bad news.

Eventually the GF herself starts messaging me for more details about the exact timeline. Because not only had they gotten back together, but they had been discussing marriage and she noted that one of our hookups occurred within days of them ring shopping. Yikes.

Other notable facts I found out over the course of our conversation, which extended into the next day: Ben gave her chlamydia the first month they started dating. Ben has literally NEVER been faithful to her – the first time she caught him cheating was the previous October when they had only been together for several months. Ben might be a little bit of an alcoholic. Ben might be a little bit of a racist. Ben is broke. Sex with Ben is boring (I disagreed there – I thought it was great). Her family doesn’t like Ben. She was in the habit of combing through Ben’s apartment whenever she visited looking for traces of other women – how romantic!

I felt bad for her, really, and tried to be as helpful as I could with details and screenshots showing the depths of his depravity. I was definitely done with Ben at that point – I only sent a text the next day to tell him I felt bad for the way everything went down (which he did not answer) – but was just maybe sort of hoping she would wise up and get away from him because he really made a fool out of her.

I didn’t really care either way though – I had washed my hands of the situation and moved on with my life. Until a week and a half later when I woke up one morning to find a FB message from Ben. He had taken the time out to unblock me and send a message about how there are “no hard feelings” and how he realized how much pain he had caused to his “future wife”…and then reblocked me again.

WHAT? First off…no hard feelings? LOL. Why the fuck would there be any towards me when he’s the one who was the complete liar the whole time!? Yet he had the nerve to come at me as if he’s blessing me with the gift of forgiveness over a situation that he brought on himself. Wow. Okay, buddy. Then secondly, I was a little flabbergasted that his GF actually took him back after alllllll that trash she talked about him. I just found something really pathetic and corny about that. Then I guess ultimately it just rubbed me the wrong way because it felt like he was pretty much just trying to rub it in my face that he had salvaged his relationship when I would’ve been just as content never hearing from him again. I kind of took as a “Fuck you.” Alrighty then…

So, I decided to drive the point home about how much of a psychotic, cheating bastard Ben is and how pitiful the GF is by creating an Instagram account of nothing but screenshots of exchanges between Ben and I which pretty much drove the point home about how devious, dishonest, and how much of a complete hound he is.

I tagged her, the BFF, and as many friends of hers as I could muster up. She blocked me right away; it took the BFF a little more time. Everyone else I’m sure did as well but I stopped caring to log into the account after amusing myself with it for a few days.

So after I wore myself out with that, I left it alone and forgot about the situation. Until this past Saturday when I received not one, but 2 “Heys” from Ben via text. I figured out it was his number almost immediately, but he never responded. After a few hours I asked him wtf he was texting me for. He said he had noticed my number on his “blocked list” and wanted to know who it was before realizing it was me. Uh…what?!

Yeah, okay buddy. So you felt the need to text a number you allegedly blocked for what reason? That didn’t really make any sense and I told him so. He stopped answering after I pretty much called him on his nonsense. I think he knows it was me and was trying to put out a feeler of some sort. No thanks.

One thought on “The Lowdown on Ben

  • How many relationships do you get into where the guy already has another girl? almost seems like 100% of the time from the blogs. I feel sorry for the girl taking a cheating man back. I didn’t and wouldn’t ever take a cheating woman back. I guess the saying is always true “Once a cheater… always a cheater”


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