Laser TMI

My life isn’t really that interesting at the moment. But on the plus side, I get a lot of sleep these days due to my lack of adventure.

The most exciting thing I can say I have done lately is to have a nice young lady zap my vagina and surrounding nether regions with a high-powered laser in the first of 6 sessions I am embarking upon on my quest for permanent hair removal.

It’s something I’ve had in the back of mind for quite a while now ever since my falling out with my wax salon last summer. Since then, but for the time Scout treated me to a “sugaring” procedure the next day, I’ve resorted back to shaving due to a basic laziness-based disinterest in putting forth the effort to find another suitable waxing facility. The problem with shaving is that I have coarse hair down there and am thus subject to in-grown hairs that lead to bumps and scarring and do not allow my vagina to live up to its full beauty potential. Even keeping the shaving to the barest minimum I can tolerate if I don’t want to look like a wild jungle bush woman, which is every 2 weeks, doesn’t help matters.

I typically have resilient skin which fades scars well, but essentially re-irritating my skin every 2 weeks with the shaving hinders any progress. Once I started waxing regularly, my skin down there was doing really well, but shaving has sent it all back to hell.

My only initial reluctance in trying laser hair removal centered on fiscal concerns. Carly had gotten some done a while back and I remember her saying it ran her a little over a thousand dollars. So as far as I was concerned, it was something that I COULD spring for if I had extra money to blow or saved up for a little bit, but it wasn’t going to be a high priority expense.

But recently I was doing some browsing on Groupon for travel purposes and saw that there was a category for laser hair removal specials so I started exploring some of the options. Firstly based on price and then secondly on reviews. When pricing out anything with many options, I definitely try to go cheaper than the most expensive, but am also wary of anything that seems too-good-to-be-true cheap because that usually means too cheap to be good.

I found some appetizing deals for 6 sessions, which is a standard minimum course of treatment, but then the Groupon fine print became a separate issue. The Groupons were only good for 90 – 120 days for the most part, which only gives you 3-4 months to complete treatment before the special expires. Laser hair removal can only be performed every 5-6 weeks due to the hair growth cycle. Lasers can only target hair follicles in the actively growing stage, so that’s why multiple sessions are necessary. So 6 sessions for one area would take a minimum of 7 months. If I only have up to 4 months to use a Groupon, that presents a problem.

In any case, the place I narrowed my search down to was sold out of 6-session specials for a “large” area (which would encompass a brazilian) anyway. But I liked their reviews so I decided to call them to explore pricing options without going the Groupon route. I called last Thursday and they invited me in for a consultation that evening.

I liked the setting and the doctor seemed like he knew what he was talking about. I am considered a good candidate because I am fairer skinned with dark hair, so the pigment contrast helps the laser target the hair follicles more accurately. He also explained that laser hair removal is actually not literally “permanent,” as hormonal changes could renew the treated follicles or whatever, but that successful cases may only require a touch-up once or twice a year or so.

Cool. I’ll take that over waxing or shaving regularly any day. I was offered 6 sessions for $697.00 for full brazilian removal, which included a discount for buying the sessions ahead. Let’s see…I got waxed regularly for 18 months every 5 weeks at about $55.00 a pop, so that was almost $800 spent right there for only temporary results. SOLD! I scheduled my first session for that Saturday.

I was nervous about the pain factor. I heard everything from that it feels along the same as waxing to people making it sound worse than natural childbirth. For me, it was about the same as a wax. At least for the first session. The technician said she starts out “conservative” for the first time in case your skin doesn’t take too kindly to it. I suppose the next session might be a bit more intense.

Time-wise, it didn’t take more than 10 minutes. It’s just a zap to each spot and then she moves on to the next. It was so easy that I made a game-time decision to throw in my underarms as well. They still had a Groupon available for 6 sessions for a “medium”/underarm area that was so cheap that I wouldn’t even have been that worried about it expiring before I could get through all 6. But she told me I could just bypass the Groupon and buy the 6 directly at the same rate, so that’s what I did. So she did my underarms as well.

The only thing I’ve noticed over the past few days is a minor itchiness, more so in the underarms than down below. And that is normal. I can’t really tell if it has worked thus far. You have to be shaved before each treatment, so it’s not like you can literally see hair falling out. I won’t be able to tell until my hair down there starts growing back. I shave my underarms daily so that won’t be a good gauge, but I intend to forgo shaving down there altogether (except for bikini line maintenance) except for when my treatments come about so I should be able to see progress when it grows out each time. The treated follicles, from what I understand, should shed hairs and at least be growing in thinner or not at all, so I think what happens is that as you go along, your hair starts growing in patchy (the technician described it specifically as “zebra stripe” pattern), and as more of the follicles get treated as the sessions go along , you will have 80%  or more hair reduction.

Exciting, huh? Maybe not really…

 

2 thoughts on “Laser TMI

  • Wow as a Man, I didn’t know the cost of keeping the vag looking tidy was that costly. For most men a set of trimmers is adequate maintenance of our pubic region.

    I often wonder if you’re a model because you spend a lot of care on your self appearance almost seems like you need to do it for your profession.

    Like

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