Tinder Tales

I’m not sure there was ever an “uphill” for Tinder, but as a long-time off and on user, I think it can be safely said that it has gone dramatically and irrevocably downhill.

Charmer #1/Probably Hates His Mother: Logan


Initial message. Self-explanatory. I’m sure Logan has to beat the ladies off with a stick.

Charmer #2/Likely Has an STD: Joseph


Joseph’s first message to me was to tell me I’m sexy. Upon my response, his second message to me was to ask if I wanted to hang out. That approach reeked strongly of hookup intent, so my reply to him was that I don’t do that, and the rest of the conversation ensued as pictured above.

Even if I were specifically and intentionally seeking a hookup on Tinder, it would take a lot more than 2 messages to pique my interest. Maybe about 10. Call me high maintenance.

In any case, note that that brief chat was 2 days old when Joseph decided to message me out of the blue with his “offer.” Because I obviously signified a lot of interest by allowing the conversation to languish for 2 days. Very smooth.

Charmer #3/He’d Murder Anyone Who Left Him: Shane

This very one-sided conversation took place within minutes of us matching. Back-to-back, pure, unadulterated mania.

And my name is right there, dude…really?!

Charmer #4/Persistent in a Bad Way: Charles


I just happened to see this today in that filtered message box on Facebook. No…just NO. I mean, he’s right that I’m not on Tinder much. But he’s wrong in his self-aggrandizing rationale that that’s the reason I didn’t respond to him. That’s Tinder life – you match with people who may end up not responding to you for whatever reason. The proper recourse is NOT to then find a person on Facebook and try to initiate contact that way. Someone who is not interested on Tinder will probably not be any less uninterested on Facebook.

But alas, his is what I subject myself to on a semi-regular basis. Oh, the joys of Tinder and modern dating. Call me a masochist.

5 thoughts on “Tinder Tales

  • I’ve had some successes on Tinder, but yes, there are definitely more negatives than positives! One guy, his first message was “let’s get naked together,” which was a little bit nicer than some of the others who were looking for just a hookup, so I responded by asking him to convince me that was worth my time. He told me that was too much work. My profile says I’m sapiosexual (turned on by intelligence) and I had a guy ask me if that meant I was pretty adventurous sexually. I told him I was, but that it wasn’t related to my liking intelligent conversation. Within 10 minutes he was asking if I was into anal. It’s getting harder and harder to find a positive match. *sigh* Good luck! Thanks for sharing your journey with us!

    Liked by 1 person

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