Men & Stuff

Woody still sniffs around on occasion, but I’ve been honest with him in that he has no chance here, and I think (or hope) that he’s come to accept that. We had to have this discussion a couple of weeks ago after he made a sexual innuendo regarding there being an “opening” at work that he’s hoping to fill. It was clear that the opening in question was my vagina. Gross (my exact reply). He then said I might be surprised what happens if I put half the energy into realizing I like him that I do into NOT liking him. I explained that it’s not a matter of liking him or not liking him, I’m just not interested in getting involved with anyone I work with (been there, done that, got the T-shirt, wrote the novel, directed the movie, won the Oscar, and so forth…). He said all he wants is one kiss so he knows what he’s never going to have. I didn’t even entertain that comment.

I like him a lot actually. I just don’t want to have sex with him. Like I don’t want to have sex with my brothers. Or other male relatives. Or any other chronically platonic male figures in my life. But I do like him…he’s not a bad guy at all.

He asked me out to dinner the week before last, but that never came to fruition. I wasn’t sure if that would be sending him mixed signals so I didn’t bother with it. We’ve talked here and there since, but I try to keep my distance so as not to give him the wrong impression.

In other news, there’s a guy, Howie, that I went to college with. Since those years, we’ve kept in touch intermittently through Facebook. He’d send me messages every blue moon to see how I’m doing and I’d politely respond. A few weeks ago he hits me up to remark on how he didn’t know that a buddy of his from high school was my cousin. I do vaguely recall us uncovering that fact back in college, and I told him this. He laughed and said he forgot. Then he proceeded into the usual catching up – how have you been, where are you living, etc. But then there was a deviation – he suggested that we could get a cup of coffee sometime. I thought that was out of the norm, but I figured he was just being polite. And politely in turn, I said that’d be great. And really, I wouldn’t mind doing that, so I wasn’t just saying that for the hell of it, but I just didn’t think he was serious. I figured we’d make tentative plans and then I wouldn’t hear from him for the next year or so, like usual. But after that, he started hitting me up every few days via Facebook and we’d shoot the breeze for a little bit. He eventually repeated the coffee suggestion and we even went so far as to exchange numbers.

My cousin hits me up on Facebook the Friday before last and reveals that Howie has had a crush on me since college. I was hard-pressed to believe this because I never got that vibe from him back in college. Granted, I never knew him that well…our social circles intersected to some extent but I only knew him through friends.

I was amused, so I decided to speak directly to Howie myself, as I now had his number to do so. I texted him asking if what my cousin said is true. He was caught off-guard of course, but he conceded that my cousin told the truth – he had a college crush on me and always thought I was very attractive. He again suggested we get together for coffee. I actually don’t drink coffee at all. Never had it and never intend to. I told him this, and then revealed that alcohol is a perfectly acceptable substitute. He said we could grab a drink then, and I said I’d like that.

And…I haven’t heard from him since. So oh well. He’s the one that asked me out, so the ball is in his court. I’m completely disinterested in being the primary pursuer or initiator in any romantic scenarios these days. If he was serious about going out, then I expect I would’ve heard from him by now. Meanwhile, I’m not losing sleep over it or anything. He’s pretty good looking, but not my usual type. He does have a great body – if it’s still the way I remember it from college and from his Facebook pictures – pretty muscular, but not repulsively so. I’d entertain him, if he came correct. But otherwise, no love lost. Literally.

On Friday, Domino was talking some football related trash on Facebook, and I wrote on his status that he’s gay. He sent me a text later exclaiming that of all people, I should know he’s not gay. (Wow, how clever.) I told him that actually, I’ve had my suspicions since he gave me, of all people, the cold shoulder. What a jackass.

Last week I bit the bullet and reconnected with an ex – Hawk. We had a falling out 3 years ago and hadn’t spoken since. We had already been over by that point but were pretty amicable until then. I barely remember the specifics, but it surrounded the fact that he was obviously hinting at rekindling our romance at a certain point, but then tried to deny it when I called him on it and then tried to play the tough guy role. So I got fed up with him and cut him off completely. But recently, I’d randomly started wondering what he was up to. I went back and forth between letting sleeping dogs lie and sucking it up and reconnecting due to curiosity about how his life is going. Eventually the curiosity got the best of me so I scoured Facebook, found him, and we ended up messaging a bit. He gave me his number and told me I could call him sometime, but I didn’t get around to it until Saturday night. We spoke and caught up. He seems to be doing well and I’m glad. I’m completely uninterested in rekindling anything romantic with him (not that he would want that himself or anything), but he’s an alright guy and perhaps we’ll stay in touch. We’ll see.

So as it stands now, summer is over, and winter is approaching, which is apparently when you’re supposed to try to find someone to keep you warm when it’s cold outside. I guess I’m SOL for right now.

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