Blaze = Extinguished

So on Monday it occurred to me that I hadn’t heard from or spoken to Blaze since August 20th. That struck me as odd because I’d always heard from him every couple of days or so. But given that he said he’d be on vacation for the next couple of weeks the last time he was here, I figured he was just caught up in whatever he’s doing. I’d kind of forgotten about him anyway, honestly.

He crossed my mind Monday night though, so I sent him a text to say hello. As of last night he still hadn’t answered, so I figured I’d see if he was up to anything special via some trusty old Facebook stalking. I’ve been Facebook stalking him since I met him, unbeknownst to him. We’re not friends on there, but some of his privacy settings are shaky so I’ve always been able to see a fair amount of pictures and statuses.

Somehow I already knew what I’d discover on his page. I’ve always had a great sense of intuition, especially when it comes to men. I figured if I hadn’t heard from him in that long, it probably involved a girl of some sort.

So I wasn’t too surprised when the first thing that popped up on his Facebook page was he and some chick declaring their relationship “Facebook Official” as of Monday. And you know it’s serious if it’s Facebook Official. So then it made sense why we had the long lapse in contact.

Admittedly, I was a little blown. Not angry, because he owes me no explanation of any sort. I knew we were in no way, shape, or form going anywhere; that was obvious from the get-go. But it would’ve been nice to keep him in my pocket for a little while longer. I hadn’t even gotten to have sex with him yet. So I was blown. Maybe even the teensiest bit jealous. But certainly not angry or anything. It is what it is.

Of course I nosed around her page as well. She’s not bad looking, but nothing to write home about. Nothing particularly interesting or special to look at. And she appears to have a small child. I’m fairly confident it isn’t Blaze’s. But you never know…

Ironically, like probably 5 minutes after this discovery, Blaze finally answers my text. I ask him what’s up and he says he’s just lying around. I tried to make a little small talk, but his responses were sparse. I figured he was either falling asleep or in the company of his new woman.

I went back and forth between whether or not I should reveal that I know he has the girlfriend, or to just keep it to myself. Either way, I knew that contact between us would start to wane. The only reticence I had for revealing this knowledge is that he’d know I was Facebook stalking him, or think I was otherwise stalking him. But I’m not really that self-conscious about Facebook stalking. I mean, I only have access to what people allow me to. If your privacy settings aren’t stringent, like Blaze’s definitely AREN’T, then that’s on you. Otherwise, it’s not like I’m hacking into peoples’ computers like Lisbeth Salander, implanting programs and stealing files and what not. But I do know my way around the internet. So I wasn’t extremely worried about that.

I was very tempted to keep it to myself because I was curious to see if he’d still try to fool around with me at some point while he’s in his relationship, while still keeping it from me. So I halfway thought about playing it like normal to see if or when that would happen. And then I’d bust him. But I don’t really have the patience for that.

And on the other hand, I didn’t want him to feel like he has to find a way to start phasing me out of his life, or like he has to start ignoring my texts or anything. I decided to let him know I know, and to leave this thing on peaceful terms.

So the last text I sent him last night stated that I know he has a girlfriend now and that I won’t be hearing from him anymore, but I wish him all the best.

He answered me early this morning – he fell asleep, and yes, he has a girlfriend. I said I guess that’s why he told me he’s always “busy.” He said no, he actually was busy, but he does have a girlfriend. I told him to hit me up when he grows bored with her (and that probably came off as me offering him some side action, but I meant bored with the relationship as a whole), and he said he would. And that was that.

Bye, Blaze. It’s been real.

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