I’ve had a great time lately hanging out with good friends and family I haven’t seen in a while and getting drunk out of my mind. Well, that was last weekend at least.
Thursday night was my “Friday” and after a long, hot workweek I was satisfied with simply laying out on my couch watching movies. In the midst of this period of contentment, reflection, and light drinking, I decided to offer my apologies to Mr. Smooth. Yes, yes, I know – I swore I’d forget his existence and never talk to him again, but honestly I just felt bad. Cursing him out made me feel good for the moment, but leaving things in the midst of such bitter and hateful energy like that didn’t offer me real closure. Real closure entails acceptance. I have to accept that it’s over and be okay with it. If I was able to get THAT mad at him, then I guess I hadn’t accepted that it’s over. And it IS over. If Mr. Smooth wanted me, he’d be with me. If he and his wife are really separated as rumored, then what would be stopping him now? Nothing.
Be that as it may, I texted him the following:
I’m sorry for saying what I said to you. You hurt my feelings a lot over time & again that night & I was purposely trying to be vicious to try & hurt you in return. I know we will probably never be cool again, but I just wanted to apologize. I should’ve been better than that. Heard about you & your wife. Sorry.
I was hesitant about saying anything else to him, even in apology. It wasn’t merely the fact that it involved some heavy duty pride swallowing (not the fun swallowing), but I didn’t know how he’d react. I was scared he might really be fed up with me talking to him and REALLY start taking steps to get back at me at work somehow. And I knew I wouldn’t know how he was reacting because he wouldn’t answer me one way or another.
But for once, he surprised me. I got a “Thx” from him at 12:35 p.m. the next day. Simple, but appreciated. I was floored that he actually acknowledged me. I said “Ok” a couple of hours later and that was that.
Okay…no more Mr. Smooth. Seriously.
Friday night, I ventured to the work watering hole. I ran into a friend/colleague that I haven’t seen in a while – Lincoln. Lincoln is a cool guy that I’ve known for a while. He’s always expressed interest in me, but I could never tell if it’s a serious interest or just a sexual interest. I’m not too attracted to him, so I never really bothered to find out. I must say that he did seem to have my back when some high school-like drama started coming my way a while back, so for that, he is appreciated.
Lincoln initially said that he wouldn’t be staying too much longer. He was heading to this other spot that he likes to hang out at. I’d actually hung out with him there a while ago. He invited me to come but it’s not really my cup of tea. It caters to an older crowd and plus the music is way too loud. Lincoln’s in his early 40’s, so he fits right in, but I kind of don’t.
He was going to be meeting a buddy of his down there, but the buddy ended up coming to our spot first, so Lincoln ended up staying longer and buying me a few drinks.
He claimed that his interest in me was not just sexual. Okay.
Well, when Lincoln and his friend started getting ready to head to the other spot, I decided to tag along. There wasn’t anyone else in our current bar that I knew like that, so I opted to continue hanging out with Lincoln and feel him out a bit.
I follow him to the other spot and things are fine at first. He buys me a drink right off and even some food. He makes conversation with what appear to be some female regulars while I eat at a table across the way. Cool.
I venture back over to him after I finish eating. I stand and drink for a while, then he asks if I want to sit down and points me to a seat at a table where some chick is sitting. I assume she’s another regular he’s cool with. I sit down. She’s in the middle and he’s across from me. It gets a little strange from here.
I’m sitting and drinking and he barely says two words to me. The chick sitting with us, on the other hand, seems to have most of his attention. Or seems to be commanding it, I can’t tell which. I could sense the slightest bit of tension on her end though, it was a weird vibe. All I know is that she seemed to be on him really hard.
She didn’t look like much to be honest, but her dress was cute. I told her so, just to feel her out. She rendered a chilly “Thank you.” I don’t think she cared for me. That’s when I knew that there must be something between her and Lincoln. Either she used to mess with him, is currently messing with him, or wants to mess with him.
When she left, he walked out with her. This took 5 minutes or so. When he came back in he sat in the same seat, but still didn’t say much to me.
I got tired of being ignored 10 minutes after that, so I got up and told him I was rolling out. He bade me goodbye and I was left to find my way back to my car around the corner by my lonesome.
So, let me get this straight. YOU claim to like me and YOU invite me to this sub par hangout spot of yours, yet YOU then proceed to pay me hardly any attention and EVEN make me feel kind of like a fifth wheel around some homely ass friend of yours and then can’t even be gentleman enough to walk me to my car when I leave?!
I thanked him via text on the way home for NOT walking me to my car (I am the QUEEN of sarcasm). I said something about his “friend” but I can’t remember exactly what.
He called me a few minutes later, seemingly not affected by my sarcasm. He just wanted to make sure I was making it home okay. Gee, thanks.
First “Marie,” now this. I’m getting a little tired of being upstaged by these homely ass chicks. Not that Lincoln’s a huge deal, it’s just the principle of the matter. Whatever. I’ll remind him of this whenever he’s all in my face again.
On the bright side, there were two very excellent things that came out of this night. One of which will probably get me in trouble. Actually, both probably will…