No Go

So Stallion wanted to come over the other night. We haven’t been involved for a few months now, so it was completely random. Apparently, he took me asking him earlier that night if he was working to mean that I wanted him to come over after work. I said absolutely nothing flirty or sexual to him, so I’m not sure how he made that connection, but whatever.

My body went back and forth with my mind for a little bit. My mind, knowing that I don’t like Stallion like that anymore, didn’t really care to have him over. On the other hand, my body thought it’d be nice to get some attention. My body won out eventually. That’s how a lot of the drama in my life begins, with my body leading the way…

So he came. Just not the way he wanted to.

We start making out within minutes of him getting here. Unfortunately, his idea of kissing is to take the tip of his tongue and lick around my lips, which I hate. It feels slimy and gross and I’ve told him this several times before, but obviously he doesn’t listen.

He starts putting himself to better use by giving me head. It’s okay for what it is, but I realize shortly into it that I’m really just not feeling it/him. I reciprocate for a little bit in the interest of fairness, but it doesn’t go any further than that. I tell him straight up I’m just not into him like that anymore.

He thinks I don’t think he’s attractive. That’s certainly not the case. He’s not my former Italian Stallion (hence the name) for nothing. He’s handsome, and he keeps his body in great shape for someone his age (43), so it’s not an issue of attractiveness. It’s just an issue of me not being attracted TO him.

He thinks I’m just trying to get back at him for whatever. That’s not it either. I wasn’t trying to be some huge tease on purpose, but it just worked out that way. Oh well.

Chances are, based on past experience, that he wouldn’t have been able to get or keep it up for long and thus we wouldn’t have been able to have sex anyway. So on the bright side, I saved him a little bit of embarrassment.

We hugged when I walked him out and left things on a positive note, but I know he was disappointed. I felt a little bad but he’s a big boy, he can take it. He has a wife he can fuck, after all. I’m the one who still remains sexless.

I went out for drinks with a coworker Saturday night after work and I called Stallion on the way home and we talked for a good while. Everything is as it should be there.

So my man/sex drought continues. Yet here I am buying lingerie from Lingerie Diva (I like that site – it reminds me of Frederick’s of Hollywood, but with a much bigger selection) as if I have anyone to wear it for.

This get-up will just go into the drawer with the rest of the lingerie that’s currently collecting dust until someone comes along that I deem worthy of bringing it out for. I wish I weren’t so particular with my taste in men…

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